oh I mean – monday’s moments of present moment enlightenment… ha ha ha
I had a good night’s sleep and for that, I am very grateful. I did my morning meditation beginning by scanning my body and relaxing whatever I could. It’s frankly amazing that even after sleep, my body could hold tension. I watched the breath and did the usual naming of thoughts that came and went, as well as songs that came and went. (sometimes a thought and a song came in at once…) LOL I actually had a couple moments, though, when I just enjoyed the experience of my body sitting on my bed in my room as I listened to the sounds of the dogs and the cars. I was just listening and there were VERY TINY EENSY WEENSY NANO SECONDS where I just entertained nothing but interior and exterior sensations.
And THEN of course I had the thought, “wow! I just had some nano seconds of just sensing my body and the room and the sound of the cars!” and this made me chuckle.
My mind wandered and did it’s thing and then I noticed it and this was what happened for some time. It’s kind of a game in a way. It’s also just time to hang out with myself. I remember a lot of time in my younger days when I could just hang out by myself and with others and not have to say a word. In my adult life, I value silence so much. I remember my mom saying (or rather yelling) “I JUST WANT TO HEAR QUIET!!!” And me, being a kid, I thought she was crazy. Well mom, if you can read this from heaven, I get it now! But I’m also getting that all of it is ok. The noise, the thoughts, the dreams, the processing, the imaginings, the conversations that I play back in my head. It’s fine. Whatever. This too shall pass… I’ll deal with whatever I need to deal with and move along. The bigger things might take more out of me and hopefully I can know when and how to shake off the small shit that niggles in my head… I am grateful for this strong mind. I see the importance that these books are illustrating about how important it is to cultivate doing AND being together…
The day was as full as can be. This morning I was smart and got the various things I wanted to make sure to do BEFORE even going downstairs and being interrupted by the kids. Boy, that made a big difference. I accomplished quite a lot and actually also had 2 phone calls today and 1 email that required a lot of my attention. Two of these three things were plenty intense or at least they could have been if I was in a different frame of mind. I handled them well and bounced back really well too. So I give myself some kudos for this. I think, in some ways, I’m growing up. 🙂