Blog / healing

Holy cow! Today I did a little breathwork session with Sandra Denner. She is hosting a breathwork intensive in June here in Worcester and asked if I wanted to have a little taste of what is going to occur. I agreed and she came to my house today for said taste. She was describing what I was going to do... "Breathe heavy and hard for an hour" is what I thought and then said, "Well, that's more of a meal than a taste, Sandra!" :-) But I'm open and I laid down on the table and I started breathing the way she showed me.

This, I have to say, is way more intense and profound than any meditating. When I was in labor with my second child, I had my first awakening to my chakras. I felt my subtle self - tingling in my face and hands and feet. I felt so alive and blissed out. I asked the nurse about the tingling sensations and she and the doctor said, "well, if you had an epidural, we'd be worried right now but you are going au natural, so if you don't mind it, we say go for it."

Ever since that birth experience with my daughter, I would have these kind of spontaneous awakenings here and there. I couldn't control them. Sometimes they'd happen while driving and I actually gave up driving for a while because I didn't want to alarm anyone (mainly my kids.) I just figured this was part of my journey, part of the changes I've had in my body since childbirth and more intensely since the age of 35. I tried asking various doctors and people and they all had similar responses. I went to a 2 week shamanic intensive with journeying for 6 hours a day and I journeyed through one of these experiences. I'll have to write about that later but I'll just say that I'm getting more and more accepting of these things that happen.

Anyway, I'm on the table and I'm breathing like Sandra demonstrated I should. I start thinking, "I hope the hour goes by fast." And within minutes I'm feeling the tingling of my whole body. She asks me if any thought is popping up but it's more just the feelings that I feel. I'm experiencing the whole thing and following my breath. The tingling sensations are getting super strong and intense. My ears are buzzing. I feel like a tuning fork. I feel like I've got electrical currents going through my body.

At one point, there are some super stiff parts of my body happening - my hands are super stiff. My knees are super stiff. I'm just breathing through them as these intense feelings of buzzing is going through me. Sandra tells me to "keep breathing, I'm doing great." These are stuck patterns that I need to breathe out of me. OK, I'll keep breathing. I'm sort of feeling very similar feelings to when I was giving birth to both my kids. The feeling of intense energy and needs to release, exhale, breathe, moan and whatever else. The stiffness in my hands and feet goes away and I'm breathing again and feeling the buzz buzz buzzing all over. It is a part of me and outside of me. I don't seem to feel the room or the outside anymore. It's all seeming to be the same thing.

So I think, "OK, I can roll like this for a while. It's intense but I feel very alive. I'm giving birth again. I did that for 8 hours, I can do this for an hour." And then wouldn't you know it, another wave came over me. This time I saw my skeleton. I felt as if I was being held on my head and neck and it was dark. There was no light that I could see from my eyes, even while shut, I could only see blackness. It was a deep dark fear I was clearly working through. "Keep breathing, you are taking very courageous breaths," Sandra said. So I'm breathing and I'm breathing and it is heavy and intense and I'm now feeling like I don't care if it takes hours, I'm going to breath until this dark shit goes away. Now I'm on a mission! So I'm breathing and breathing and I'm focusing on my breath instead of the darkness and the skeleton I see. Wow, this was an amazing trip!

Eventually, I felt like I literally labored through that one. I was definitely reminded of giving birth, except I thankfully don't remember any dark skeletons during any of my kids' labors! LOL I can only describe this feeling as being intensely in one's body, feeling every bit of energy in and around me. It's really an amazing feeling. So this feeling goes away and I'm left with an even wider open space inside me. Just breathing breathing breathing. I am back to seeing colors even with my eyes shut. I always see colors when I meditate and journey and stuff so this is normal for me. I am feeling very trippy and groovy in all good ways. I have had this feeling many times before, in meditation, etc. It's a down right amazing feeling. It's intense for sure. I am still buzz buzz buzzing all in my hands, my ears, my body, my chakras, my feet, my everything. It feels like I'm feeling the energy in the whole of the earth.

Of course I went through another wave, although not as intense, but it was a feeling of being held a bit on my head. This was not an upsetting feeling and I breathed through it and more opening occurred. Now I'm in total bliss out land. I love it here and yet I'm also saying that it must be about time to end. Sure enough, Sandra says, "five more minutes." So I'm breathing and breathing and breathing and I'm just purely experiencing the feelings of being in me, of being in my body. Thank goodness there wasn't more visions, I think I had enough sensations for a Monday morning.

So OK, now it was time to relax my breath. I'm slowing down my breath and I'm relaxing. Now my body is shaking like an animal for what felt like 20-30 minutes or so. I just lay there until all the shaking was done. I'm used to the shaking too. It happened after panic attacks a long time ago and I finally got to a place where I just took it to be an animal response to "shake off" a fear. I even read a year or so ago about this as a healthy way to get rid of fears and traumas, so YAY ME for just being ok with it even before I saw it in print. Again, I'm grateful not too many people see it because I'm sure it would worry them. But I'm fine. I always feel quite fine when the shaking off happens. And Sandra was also OK with the shaking off. She said it was normal to have this happen. How nice to be validated.

So that was my breathwork experience this morning! I feel really really good. I'm of course now wondering if I'll be able to attend the intensive that she's having in June. I'll post it up soon so that you and I know the details. :-) I'm really grateful for the experience. It was hella intense but most things worth doing take some effort! Thank you Sandra for coming over today and sharing this with me. It's quite a phenominal experience.

So the past 3 weeks has been filled with a cold/sinus infection that has been quite wild. It's been years since I had anything like this so I am very grateful for the way I've been caring for myself with diet/exercise. I think that's played the biggest part in my health thus far. I can remember before going raw, being sick once a month for quite a long period of time (like 2 years) so I've come a long way so far on this journey and I intend to keep plugging away in this raw food/healthy life endeavor. :-) I wanted to write out what I've been doing to take care of a sinus infection sans antibiotics. I've never done this before and I do acknowledge that it takes a bit more diligence than popping an antibiotic each day. So let's begin with alllllllll the things I've been doing in the past 3 weeks. OK, let's go... The week prior to me becoming sick, my kids had a cold/cough - they were relatively mild colds and the cough went away within a week. They were coughing in my general direction each day for a week and that's typically not a big deal. They've done that before. My immune system is usually quite strong. This week, however, I had some stressors come in that I think, in retrospect, brought my immune system down a bit. So when the feeling came on that I was feeling run down (late on Friday, Feb 19th), I tried some hydrogen peroxide sprays in my ears. This came from my friend Peter. He said he earned about it years ago from a retired MD (Stewart Fason, aka "Dr. Jon") who liked to buck the medical establishment. He gave me a link on it here: http://www.healingdaily.com/exercise/hydrogen-peroxide-in-ears.htm. So I tried it. I sprayed a couple sprays in my ears and I definitely felt like some germs were getting attacked! I did that for 2 nights. I'm always concerned about QTYs and durations of things when I do them and I admit leaning on the side of being a conservative when it comes to herbs. Hydrogen peroxide is what I use to bleach things so I was thinking I didn't really want to put a lot of bleach in my ears for too many days. I will also say that I'm quite a sensitive sort. For my height/weight, I would/could be prescribed a lot (at least what adults typically get) but I require only a child's portion of most medicines and that does me really well. Anyway, along with the hydrogen peroxide, I started gargling with salt water and using the neti pot. I was starting to feel a bit of congestion in my right ear and my right sinus. So for the first few days, I was doing these things 3 x per day. I began taking my herbs: I almost always take the Healthy Woman elixir because I just love it so much but started adding the Immune Builder herbs and because at this point my glands were starting to get swollen, I took the Lymph Cleanse tinctures. Again, taking these things 3 x per day. I started making a morning pudding so I could add in lots of stuff. This is what I've been eating each morning for the past 3 weeks. breakfast vitamineral pudding 1 banana frozen berries when I had them 1/4 - 1/3 cup raw oats 1 oz E3 Live 1 tsp medicinal mushrooms 1 tsp vitamin C 1 tsp magnesium calm 1/2 tsp astragalus powder acidolphilus bifidus capsule that I emptied therapeutic enzyme cap that I emptied supergreens - about 1-2 tsp vitamin code b complex capsules, emptied zyflamend softgels that I emptied omega 3 oil sunflower nut butter drizzle of hemp seed milk Whirl around in a small food processor until a pudding like consistency. This was soo good I made a less potent variety of it for the kids. Other morning supplements: I took ginger force daily with some water, sucked on zinc lozenges and a liquid drop of Vitamin D. I typically don't take supplements. I usually take some medicinal mushrooms in my smoothie each day but I felt that with my immune system down, extra help would be good. The pudding is great because I basically emptied a bunch of herbs/supplements and I didn't have to swallow the stuff plus the pudding tasted really really good. The first week of my cold, I stayed home and rested as best I could. Matt was away in DC so there was lots of things to do plus we had a snow storm that brought 18 or so inches in a 24 hour period. Mother Nature is big out here in VT and that took a lot of getting used to for me when we moved here. I felt like my body was improving over the course of the week. Clear, drippy, drainy sinuses started to thicken up which is usually a sign of improvement (drying up.) By week 2, I started taking pulsatilla, a homeopathic remedy for colds with thick snot. In the afternoons for the first week, I was drinking a lot of herbal teas. Teas to soothe my throat as what started in my sinuses seemed to move to my throat. Teas with marshmallow root herb and echinacea, licorice root, medicinal mushrooms seemed to feel really good. Some afternoons I had a green juice or a greens smoothie but for that first week, I wasn't super hungry. I also had elderberry syrup when I remembered to have it. Dinner tended to be some kind of wrap with green sprouts, vegetables, tempeh, steamed broccoli, seaweed. Eating usually brought about a temporary opening in my congestion and felt good. At nights, I had the humidifier going in my room as well as the pot on the wood stove to help the very dry air have some moisture. I was also taking some Self Heal flower essences (I love flower essences.) AND I was doing salt water foot soaks. This is really just something I enjoy doing but the eucalyptus and rosemary oil felt so soothing to breathe in. By week 2, I was feeling better. Matt came back from his work trip and I felt like I was coming towards the end of this cold. However, by the weekend, the stuff that was moving down to my throat wasn't really improving and my ears continued to feel clogged/congested. So, I upped my game again and I used mullein garlic oil in my ears at night. I also started trying Belladonna and switching that with Silica homeopathic remedy. I started spraying the back of my throat with propolis spray. I also read somewhere that ground mustard when used as a foot soak or as a paste on the bottom of the feet can be very antiviral. I decided I would try the mustard overnight. Matt made a paste of it and put it on the bottoms of my feet. He put on wool socks over top so that my feet would get hot at night. The problem with this for me was that some of the mustard paste got on the band of the socks that went around my ankle and I woke up in the morning with BURNS on my ankles! I guess the skin on my feet are tough enough but the skin on my ankle is a bit too soft/sensitive for mustard oil! LESSON LEARNED! I now had another thing to care for during this cold. NOTE: even basic culinary spices can be quite potent when used medicinally! (The ND told me yesterday when she makes a paste, she also adds flour to cut down the strength of the mustard as it is very potent!) So, now I know! So this is week three and I decided to go to my ND to see what else I could do as Sunday past, I started to feel drippy sinuses again and I thought, "Oh, no! It's coming back!" FYI: To take care of the burns on my ankle, I've been using the All Heal Salve and covering it with sterile gauze pads. This has been a saving grace. What a silly and painful mistake that was for my poor ankles! I don't think using the mustard paste was a mistake, just neglecting to wipe it off my ankles was the mistake. Anyway, back to the visit with the ND. She is wonderful. I told her all the stuff I've been doing. She said, "You are such a good healer! What are you doing here? You are taking such good care of yourself." This was definitely a boost as I'm sure you can imagine, 3 weeks with a cold that came back and a burned ankle doesn't necessarily FEEL like I'm caring for myself really well. She said she could write out a prescription for antibiotics for me but feels like that does way more harm than good and with my good care plus a few other things, I'll seem some good results very soon. She wanted me to continue my good regime and she wanted to really focus attention to these sinuses and ear congestion. Do the mullein garlic oil drops more (meaning more than just in the night). She made a sinus tincture for me that has 5 herbs in it that I'm to take 1/2 tsp of mixed with water, gargle and then swallow the herbs to help with the post nasal stuff going on in my throat 3 x per day. She gave me a super bio veg cap to take every 2-3 hours for 3 days and then 1 3 x per day after that. I took the zinc lozenges for a week until they tasted terrible (which is the sign that you don't need them anymore) and week 2 didn't take them. She wanted to reintroduce that again plus a WHOLE bunch more vitamin C and other things to really kick up things a notch in my body. I'm picking up this stuff called X-lear that i'm supposed to use. I'm not yet sure what that's for other than the obvious sinus stuff. She said to steam with eucalyptus oil, rosemary oil or thyme oil 1-2 x per day. And I'm to continue with the neti pot but now to add a tiny bit of goldenseal in the pot. That's cool to me because I was just using the salt. I can tell you that using the goldenseal REALLY kicks up the neti pot action up a notch! I got home yesterday and started her little program and have already been feeling a lot more clarity in my sinuses. I don't yet have the X-lear but I'll let you know how that works. I guess the only other thing that I wanted to acknowledge was the heavy duty emotional work I've been doing. I started this post by saying that some stressors came in which I think put a drain on me. I've been taking to a counselor again, doing a lot of writing, flower essences, processing, releasing. I acknowledge the powerful connection between mind/emotions/body and I don't doubt that a big part of my why my cold processing has been so lengthy is because I'm also processing a lot of old junk. So this is a spring cleaning in the truest form! I plan on doing some colonics to continue with this spring cleaning mode. Perhaps if I had done them sooner, I would have felt relief sooner but we do the best we can. Our only colon hydrotherapist is an hour away and when you run 2 houses, 2 businesses, have 2 kids and all the other stuff going on, it's really a matter of taking things one step at a time, one moment at a time. I'm grateful to have a lot of tools in my toolbelt to be able to help myself and I'm also super grateful for the community of support that I have built around me and continue to build on. With great counselors & NDs to call on, great friends to run to the store to get things for me, I truly feel like I am living a great life... even with a stuffy nose and burned ankles! LOL. Thank you for reading. I'll keep you posted as to how this moves forward.

hello good people! Has it really been since the 31st that I last wrote? Wow! Time flies when you are having fun! We are continuing to be busy which is great. We had a really good discussion after the documentary: Healing Cancer from the Inside Out, Part 1 last week. We'll see Part 2 in March (see below for info) and hopefully we'll show this again as it is very important to watch. For me, watching this film is pretty right on the money as far as what we saw with my mom's "treatment" of cancer. Another woman was there who is still trying to work on her immune system and healing her organs from having chemotherapy. Her story was powerful to listen to as were others. It's a shame that there are so many people who have direct or close experience with the sufferings of cancer and its treatments -- it's sooo hard to watch someone go through that and I'm sure it's hard to go through it. I'm so grateful to be able to show these documentaries and to hear the stories that get shared. One woman called me today to say that since watching the Simply Raw documentary in Essex Junction that her life is changing for the better! She's researching and eating raw food and is already seeing changes in her body as well as reducing her medication! HIP HOORAY! This is soooooooooo wonderful to receive calls like this. I'm happy to take them and grateful when you show up AND do the work yourself. That is great and I'm happy to help in whatever ways I can. OH Vermont Fiddle Heads is finally on Facebook! Be a fan and check out photos, events and notes. MM-kay? I have to include some more recent feedback. This one cracks me up and I love it and this woman so much: "I am dying for more of your Goddess Butter, and is out! (Maybe I should try ? Do they have any? I'll have to call and ask!) They don't have any more chick-un salad, either. :-( I've been eating the Goddess Butter spread (thickly!) in a banana sliced lengthwise. I am now addicted to Goddess bananas! I have to ration myself - and even then a jar only lasts about 4 days! :-D and then went to say: I LOVE your kim chi! I never had it before. The stuff they sell at looks - shall we say, "uninviting"? But your looks and tastes yummy! (pink - my favorite color!)" - YAYYYYY!! I am telling you I love the feedback so much. Keep it coming please. It inspires me to do more. So with all this good and powerful news, let's move on to the calendar, shall we? ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ RAW FOOD HAPS THIS WEEK AND BEYOND • Guess what tomorrow is? Valentine's day, right, but also something else... Remember that song: "When the moon is in the 7th house and jupiter aligns with Mars..." Remember? Well apparently, astrologically speaking, tomorrow morning at DAWN is the day! So get up and set your intentions for peace and love and other fun hippie stuff! :-D RIGHT ON! (NO need for drugs on raw food though, so put that pipe down, patchouli boy, and pick up a green smoothie instead!) • Raw food deliveries will be made to Hunger Mountain Coop, Sweet Clover Market and Healthy Living this coming Thursday. So get your VT Fiddle Head raw food goodies while the gettin' is good. Here's what someone has recently said about some of my raw food (they stocked up on it for a trip they were taking): "Just had one of your hazelnut spice cookies for my afternoon snack! had to bring some and the fudge down! I SHOULD be sharing but not sure I'll be able to! ...we'll see! Thanks for making such fab desserts!" You're welcome and Thank you! And don't worry about sharing - you're on vacation! hahaha • Different varieties of my raw food has been a part of the local food order since January. This is a local group so if you are in the Montpelier area and are interested in local food, herbal remedies and crafts, please check with Montpelier Commonshare to be a part of this wonderful group. I'm having fun with some MYSTERY BOXES! Yes, i do mystery boxes - didn't you know? I LOVE them. Ask me how to get a box for yourself! • Tuesday, February 17th from 6:30 - 7:30 - BERRY & NUT BREAKFAST BARS - I've been working on the recipe all week and the bars are GOOOOOOOOOD! Healthy raw breakfast bars that make wonderful hearty breakfast or snack treat! Join Linda Wooliever for an hour of fun with raw food talking and eating! Fee for the the class is $10 for members and $12 for non-members. Please contact Robin or Krystal to sign up at info@hungermountain.com • Tuesday, March 10th from 5:30 - 7:30 - Healing Cancer From Inside Out, Part Two. This is part two of an award-winning two-hour film (part one shown previously). Part 2, Healing Cancer, shows how cancer can be successfully healed with dietary treatments and natural supplementation. It explains common misconceptions about cancer, shows how diets designed to fight cancer are more successful than conventional treatments, discusses startling cancer research findings with T. Colin Campbell (The China Study) and has interviews with people who have reversed cancers using diet. It also discusses supplementation and why attitude is important in reversing not only cancer, but any disease.We'll have some raw treats to eat while we watch this important film. Please pre-register with Krystal or Robin at info@hungermountain.com or call them at 802-223-8004 x 204. Cost is $5 for members and $7 for non-members. There will be raw food treats to eat while we watch the documentary. • Fiddle Heads House Kim Chi is available and is delicious - made with local & organic: cabbages, turnips, shallots, leeks, carrots, radishes, garlic, fresh ginger and lots of love. This is hella good kim chi and it's pretty too - it's pink! (which is why it is the house blend) Comes in quart sizes and larger. $9.00/quart. Please contact me if you are interested in getting some. I'm also taking orders for Dill and Caraway Sauerkraut. This takes a month to make but worth the wait! Here's what someone has recently said about my kim chi: "Just so you know, I have been trying the different kim-chi month by month and by far prefer yours, so I am already ordering some! And yes, it is pretty - that is red cabbage, yes? As opposed to beets?" Thank you! And no, no beets were harmed in the making of this kim chi! hahaha (see the other great feedback on the kim chi ABOVE!) go on, read it again. It'll make you smile like it does me! :-) • gRAWnola available and delicious - made with all organic ingredients: apples, hazelnuts, sprouted buckwheat, soaked pumpkin seeds, dates, cranberries, dry coconut, agave, vanilla, cinnamon, lemon juice, and Celtic sea salt. Can purchase in 8 oz and 1 lb bags. Please contact me if you are interested in getting some. • our downloadable recipe book: over 70 smoothie, juices and soup recipes: http://vt-fiddle.com/shop/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=2&products_id=52 - I've already started another in the series. Be on the look out for the breakfast recipes e-book! • NEW IN STOCK: Fruits of the Earth superfood powder, Maca Force Vanilla Spice, really raw oats, raw nori sheets, chia seeds, turkish mulberries, dandy blend, wasabi powder, kelp noodles, dandelion leek miso by south river, garlic red pepper miso by south river, Eating for Beauty by David Wolfe, Naked Chocolate by David Wolfe and Shazzie, Sun Warrior Biofermented Rice Protein powder (in natural and chocolate flavors), marine phytoplankton, lucuma powder, yacon slices, really raw cashews, artisana coconut butter and tibetan goji berries. Please contact me if you are interested in getting any of these items. With everything we sell, items can be picked up or I can mail them to you. ALSO IN STOCK: Vitamix pitcher replacements. If you have an old vitamix blender, you might want to consider a new plastic pitcher to replace the one that was made with bpa plastic - it also comes with a new lid that stays on so your hand doesn't have to rest on top when you blend. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ INTERESTING THINGS TO READ • http://www.naturalnews.com/025560.html - an article entitled: Early Mammograms May Trigger Genetic Breast Cancer • http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/27/health/27brod.html?_r=1&emc=eta1 - Pat sent me this article: Babies Know -- A Little Dirt is Good for You • http://www.naturalnews.com/025568.html - article on medicinal mushrooms • http://www.chicagotribune.com/features/lifestyle/health/chi-mercury-corn-syrupjan27,0,2801323.story - and in case you missed it - mercury found in high fructose corn syrup. • http://www.timesargus.com/article/20090213/NEWS/902120283 - and this one is great. Look what makes the news here in Montpelier. I love it! ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ AND NOW FOR THAT RECIPE My Green Smoothie Dinner Tonight this is what I had for dinner two nights ago. I used what I had and that is GOOD! Use what you have and what works for you. I wasn't really in the mood for anything so I thought a filling smoothie would be great. And it was! 2 bananas 1 head of romaine 1/2 avocado 1/2 cup hazelnut milk filtered water Blend until thick and creamy, and drink. I shared this with my son who smacked his lips and said YUM! The kids like the creamy green drinks. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Enjoy your week! Stay warm and healthy! Happy Valentine's Day! in joy and in health, Linda Vermont Fiddle Heads 18 Worcester Village Road Worcester, VT 05682 802-223-2111 802-408-1000 (fax) http://www.vt-fiddle.com P.S. Keep checking back on the shop. Adding products as we speak! Bulk nuts are now posted! http://vt-fiddle.com/shop/ P.P.S. Need some bulk food items? Well, send me an email or check out what I have on my products page! NEW IN STOCK: really raw oats, raw nori sheets, chia seeds, turkish mulberries, dandy blend (a dandelion coffee substitute), wasabi powder, kelp noodles, dandelion leek miso by south river, garlic red pepper miso by south river, Eating for Beauty by David Wolfe, Naked Chocolate by David Wolfe and Shazzie, Sun Warrior Biofermented Rice Protein powder (in natural and chocolate flavors), marine phytoplankton, lucuma powder, yacon slices, really raw cashews, artisana coconut butter and goji berries. Please contact me if you are interested in getting any of these items. With everything we sell, items can be picked up or I can mail them to you. To subscribe: http://vt-fiddle.com/mailman/listinfo/raw-news_vt-fiddle.com